Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Relapse

I guess you've been wondering....

you: Hey! What happened to FU Sugar Jane? She left off at cereal and we haven't seen her since?
me: (crickets)

But.
Ack.

You probably guessed it...

Relapse!
Into the sugary depths!
Swimming in a sea of delicious body-numbing-bone-crunching-cancer-causing-sugar.

Ohhhh sugar you beeyatch, you snuck back in the door and now you're lying around with big belly and your dirty feet on my coffee table. Your sweaty socks are stinkin' up the place but it's hot damn it's been kinda great having you. You're that ex-boyfriend who I swore off eight times but once you charm your way back in all sweet promises and sparkling good times I get all flushed and codependent and I forget how to get my key back. (again)*

But let's go back to the beginning, shall we?

In late January I began reading this book:

and not very quickly.

and not very thoroughly.

because I'm pretty sure this is a GREAT idea.

and I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to let go of a lot of food choices in order to get the full bene of some damn good moods.

and do you know what happened?

it caused a slip! okay a fall. Well actually a real tumble into sugardum as I prepared to change my diet entirely...

except I stopped reading.

(I know that I'm ridiculous).

And I also know that I'll reign it in my friends! And I'll be back here preaching the good word about how good I feel and how lame sugar is with a resounding cry of FU SUGAR! And of course cheering you on again as well.

But first?

I have to quit sugar again. (scheisse)

My friend Stefanie tells the truth about the sugar train here. I'll quit if she does.

*note: VERY happily married, this is purely theoretical and meant to be funny. ahem.